Bexson Green Consulting Inc.

Coaching, Counselling-Hypnotherapy and Educational Training

Work/Life balance

Welcome to official Springtime 2017, as of today!20160312_154549  It’s wonderful to watch plants and trees bloom again, and hear the enthusiastic tweeting of the birds so early in the morning. Soon, the bears will awaken from their hibernation (arrrgh!!), but that won’t stop us from spending more time, engaged in outdoor leisure activities. Simply put, the brighter, warmer, and longer days are great for getting outdoors and playing – trying to balance your work tasks and personal life.

Today, we enjoyed a long, leisurely walk in the forest – where Andrew literally found his balance on a moss covered tree branch 20160312_154705– and we embraced the smells, sights and sounds around us, chatting to other like-minded individuals who climbed or clambered up the forest hills and crannies, regardless of how muddy and slippery they were. It was a time for us to find balance regarding our work and play; a time to breathe and enjoy life, without urgency or agenda.      

More than one month desired

North America honours Black History in the month of February; parts of the UK/Europe commemorate Black History in October. Simply put, why not have conversations everyday about Black History, plus where we are presently and where we want to be in the future.   

On another note, many talented artists have performed beautiful versions of this Nina Simone classic “Four Women.” These four ladies (Kelly Price, Marsha Ambrosious, Jill Scott and Ledisi) bring me to tears almost every time I listen to them perform this song, with their powerful voices and raw emotions, bringing Nina Simone’s four female personalities to life with such conviction. I invite you to listen and enjoy…celebrate #BlackHistory everyday, and all history everyday.  Jay.

 

 

Do Nothing

Well, once again, here we are the the beginning of a sparkling new Lunar Year, and my friends and family are already telling me that the first few weeks of 2017 have been very,very stressful for them. I concur –  I’ve found myself working overtime, and working untypically late evening hours, which leaves me little time to participate in joyful leisure activities. Twice this week, I asked two colleagues what they would be doing during their weekend off from work. Both replied “Nothing,” and they accompanied their answers with sheepish-looking grins and a guilty expression. We briefly discussed why planning to “do nothing” elicited these feeling of guilt.   

I wrote briefly about this topic for our August 2016 blog, so I won’t go into a long chat about self-care and taking time for ourselves again. It’s just a shame that the conversation is so very fresh, especially as some of us may have made a good old resolution that involves self-care and finding balance. I am struggling in these first few weeks of January, but I am presently mindful about my lack of self-care just from engaging in a few casual dialogues; thank you, friends! 🙂   On my lunch break at work yesterday, I found a quiet(ish) space and read my book (I LOVE to read) for 20 minutes, and today, I danced aerobically for 30 minutes to reggae. These are a few of my “do nothing” activities – my choices of my favourite activities on my time, and do I feel better, just a tiny bit balanced throughout the hectic day..

Taking small steps to make positive change on a regular basis equates to positive change, leading to a more balanced way of living. What will you do a few minutes a day to create a better balance for yourself? Take care and speak to you soon……I’m off, with a book in tow, to have a warm bath, with scented salts.  Jay. 

To the past, present and future


2016 is rapidly drawing to the end. As one year ends,another one begins. Another beginning, open to new possibilities, resolvable challenges and exciting changes. While it influences you, and is part of you and your life, your past doesn’t have to define your present and future. Use the past years to move forward in the present and in the future. Start from now – step by step by step – and make your dreams come true.  

201501We wish you joy, health, happiness, inspiration, creativity and love throughout 2017.

Happy Holidays to you and your loved ones,

Andrew and Jay. 

 

 

Amongst the chaos …….

Presently, Andrew and I are engrossed in the process of moving. We had completely forgotten how stressful it is to sort, purge, pack, box-up items, clean, lift and carry heavy items down flights of stairs, etc.  A “bin it, if you haven’t used it for a month” kind of person, I was astounded by the sheer amount of stuff that we’d accumulated; it’s overwhelming! The good part is that we were able to donate lots of items to charitable organizations, so that others can utilize what we thought we needed (not what we wanted just for the sake of it).

This purging of items has also been a therapeutic purging of the mind and soul. To clear clutter from your physical space also cleanses your emotional psyche, freeing space for clear thoughts, creativity and fresh ideas. Andrew and I were able to accomplish multiple tasks from a year-long wish list, once we saw the space opening up in our premises. These accomplishments have boosted our productivity, moods and feelings, helping us to manage our stress and frustration.

Living in chaos for the past few weeks has helped us to remain humble and thankful that this is a temporary situation – many people live in constant stress and chaos, whether they’re homeless, currently under or unemployed, in challenging or high risk relationships, or having to flee their country of origin for political, government or safety reasons, etc. Whatever the reason, we remember you in our regular affirmations, and we send you positive thoughts that the chaos will make sense of itself and it will pass. Change is constant, so the chaos will pass……..

Amongst our chaos, Andrew and I had to laugh at our playful cat, who decided to help us with packing her cans of food. Cat found a safe space within the chaos and now spends time sleeping in these two boxes. We’ll leave the boxes in the exact location until we move,so that cat will feel secure and less stressed. Stay safe, everyone, Jay.     

                  

What breaks the ice?

This morning, Andrew and I were tasked to pick up some administrative supplies from a new client. He appeared quiet and shy, hardly making eye contact with us. After 5 minutes, his dog began to bark at us (strangers of course), and the client called out “Be quiet Duchess!” to which the dog complied. I said “Duchess? That’s our cat’s name.”  

The client looked up at  me, smiled a big smile and said “Oh really? Good name.”   And there it was – the ice was broken……

We all continued with our tasks, more comfortable with each other, now that we had found something in common. It doesn’t take a lot, does it, to find a common thread within ourselves and with others? A comfortable connection was formed, which will greatly build rapport when we next meet with our client. How do you try to connect with others? And don’t lie and say your hamster/goldfish/rabbit is named Duchess!! 🙂   

Moonlight

'Moonlight Shadow-Cat'

It was wonderful and soothing to see the beautiful full moon last night,and enjoy the natural light which streamed through our bedroom window.

Our lovely feisty cat also appeared to enjoy the moonlight, gently purring while doing so. Although the coyotes in the field outside our home howled during the night, the moon put us and our kitty-cat in a calm and relaxed mood, and we were all able to be quickly lulled into deep sleeps, despite the wild noise and bright light.

Goodnight,moon! Jay and Andrew.

  

 

Tick Tock…

My gosh, where does time go? On the news this morning, I heard that a few “big box” stores in the USA are already promoting Christmas items;celebrations/observances throughout September, October and November haven’t occurred yet – at least give the children the chance to return to school, after their summer break!

Where’s the relaxation, and why are we typically so busy with no time to spare? I hear this complaint frequently during coaching sessions. It seems that we’re caught up in a huge rush most of the time, busy with: work; nuclear and extended families; social media; general household chores; continuing education; volunteering; exercising; social events; miscellaneous appointments, etc – the list goes on. We’re busy being busy for the sake of being busy! Should we find a small amount of “spare” time with nothing on our agenda, then what?  When I find an hour to read once a week, some of my friends berate me for not doing anything.  “Come out/over for a coffee,” they say “You must be bored, seeing that you’re doing nothing.”  

Say what? Pardon me, but reading is doing something – slowing down my brain, drinking green rice tea, and relaxing with my feet up, under a shady tree in a quiet and sunny park. Aah, bliss…… it’s so quiet, I can hear the minutes slowing ticking away on my watch; I don’t need to look. While reading is a great form of relaxation and recognition of quality time for me, I’m aware that everyone has their own way to relax and to take time. Find your personal time and activity, so that you can slow down just for a little bit each day and recharge your spirit and energy. After all, you’re going to need that energy to embrace your busy life schedule again very, very soon – that’s just our reality! 🙂          

What do you do to take time for yourself? How often and how much time do you find for yourself?

     Take care, Jay.Take time for yourself

Play time

School’s out for the summer and all around me, I can hear the sounds of unabashed joyful screams of my neighbours’ young children, as they laugh and play with pure abandon. Some parents or caregivers worry that their young children will forget the principles of learning during the two month school break. However, you can facilitate many opportunities for children to learn through play.

Learning doesn’t have to be formal. While our role includes direct teaching, we can provide opportunities for children to do what comes naturally – learn on their own. Of course, there are times when we must actively teach (e.g. tying shoes, learning about poison ivy, etc.), in order to prepare children for the world. In a nutshell, three guiding principles support play-learning:

Provide opportunities for children to learn. You are a wonderful resource for  a child. Often, a hug or a sit-down on your lap starts a conversation, or inviting a child’s friend to your home provides opportunities for play, language development, and development of social skills and self-esteem.

Allow children to lead by letting the learning happen naturally. Letting children do things by themselves will make their learning easier. Let children try, try and try again. Allowing a child to be the occasional learning leader encourages connection with other people.

Teach by modeling positive behaviour and by direct instruction. Children learn so much from the adults around them (e.g. relationships, behaviour, people, places, things, etc.), and adults model what to do in different situations. Children give you chances to extend their learning through questioning (yes, those ongoing questions!).

By using the Provide, Allow and Teach guide, you help children understand and acquire knowledge that will be the foundations of their future learning. You are encouraging a love of learning and a positive attitude, and also providing children with a process and a model for future independent learning.

Feel welcome to contact Andrew and myself by email, with your questions, or for info about our Early Childhood workshops. Enjoy the summer sun, breeze and rain 🙂 Jay.

 

Blue stripes

Stripes Who knew that the crop sweater I just bought would meet its match in the form of a car? I had to smile and capture a picture of the “almost twins,” on this sunny Vancouver weekend. It was too hot to wear the new sweater, but you always get a good bargain when you buy off-season clothing. 🙂

I would love to meet the owner of the car, who I imagine is accustomed to the car being a great conversation starter. Real-time communication is part of BGCI’s mission to support you with positively connecting to others.  Andrew and I are interested in how you begin face-to-face interactions with new people; please drop us a line. Best, Jay.

 

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